Djshakes, you got one thing wrong that ruins my entire scenario with the “real man.” I always clear space on the bottom shelf and step on it, holding the top shelf ledge and use my comb or nail file to bring an item from the back of the top shelf to the front so I can get it for my cart. This happens so fast that no one is able to offer me any help :=]
I will now profile Djshakes:
5’9 – 5’10 165 lbs
caucasian male lt brown hair but not much left
age 34 (going on 60)
a few wrinkles from too much sun and other vices
cleans up well in Dockers for his “day job”
When not at “work,” lives in Levi’s 501’s and t-shirts (some with advertising on them) and a straw hat.
Takes frequent standing smoke breaks (Marlboro Lights) on the curb outside his office and on his “view” porch and politely crushes the butts with his hands and puts them in his jeans change pocket (not in same pocket as he keeps his tic-tacs in) until he can find a trash can.
Drives a forest green (a little muddy) 1998 Ford F-150 dbl cab long bed that has seen better days. It has super “H” size tractor tires and its dual-bench seat is covered with a Mexican blanket. Keeps at least $60 of (unorganized) loose change in the center console. Takes the lumber rails off when he needs to get a good “tailwind” on the road. Occasionally throws used soda/beer cans in the bed. Cleans the interior and washes it once per year.
Drives a 1988 red Nissan Sentra to work (pickup doesn’t fit in reg or metered pkg spaces). It has zebra-stripe faux fur slipcovers and with matching dice hanging from the rearview (used to be spouse’s car from HS). The glove compartment is plastered with photos of his family scotch taped to it.
