I’m not sure any normal woman is going to want to marry a guy who offers her a Yugo as a sign of enduring affection. Can you picture it?
scene: deadzone and the woman of his dreams at the very romantic Bertrand’s at Mr. A’s. Sun setting in the background. Good jazz playing. Her eyes are twinkling. His palms are sweaty.
deadzone: Sweetheart, I want nothing more in the world right now than to spend the rest of my life with you. I dream that after the housing market crashes, you and I will move into a beautiful home and start a beautiful family.
sweetheart: Oh deadzone. (tears, they smooch until the waiter coughs — about a dozen times).
deadzone: To show how committed I am, I bought us a Yugo. You can drive around with the baby deadzones in it. (restaurant goes quiet, lights go up)
sweetheart: (frowns, cries) Deadzone, I think you have made a mistake. A man with a Toyota Tercel, a Ford Focus, a Honda Civic — even one of those Hyundai’s with the 10-yr warranty. But a man with a Yugo is no man for me. (She gets up, puts money for her part of the dinner on the table, walks off.)
Seriously, the smartest way to go about the engagement diamond thing is to ask your mom or grandma for a sentimental piece of jewelry and to give that. (Assuming you have a good relationship with your family and their taste does not include cubic zirconia.) Or, to buy a small rock and to explain that you hope that as the anniversaries roll in you hope to match that piece with earrings, bracelet, etc.
