San Diego Housing Bubble News and Analysis

No, but it could be just your street is snooty:) What area in CV do you live in. You can always join our kid's group, if you don't mind hanging out with a bunch of asians and jewish people. Yes, there are some folks that have an elitist mentality.

The worst are some of families that have the 1-income earner/stay at home trophy spouse type. I leave gender off, because in some cases it's the hubby that stays home (or works less).

Are you wearing your "Mr. Housing Bubble" t-shirt, by chance?

LOL..I feel better already....thanks!

I suspect they view you as a short timer in the neighborhood and are too busy to invest time in building a friendship with someone that will be gone ina year or two.

lol, don't worry about it. if they are that snotty, you don't want to be their friend anyway.

actually... are you black? if so, then stop reading and there's your answer. if not, read on...

those people are proud of their "achievements". middle class people who are living in half million-million dollar houses. they're 'millionaires' as far as they're concerned and you're a lousy peon renter. as everyone knows, rentals bring down neighborhoods. you'll be littering in the streets, bringing in your 20 mexican relatives, parking cars on the lawn, etc etc. because, you know, renters have no sense of responsibility, community, achievement, pride, etc etc. you're probably section 8 to boot!

actually, i suspect you'll find that attitude no matter where you go where the rent/own ratio is tilted to own. but it's fun to think the worst..

Its probably just bad luck. I rented a house close to La Costa Canyon HS on Corte Del Cruce. We moved in and one neighbor brought us a bottle of wine. Another brought us a list of all the neighbors "close by" that included names, kids names, phone numbers etc. We all waved at each other when we pass by etc. It was very friendly.

Maybe consider having a little get together at your house and get the friendly neighbors to encourage others to come. Maybe put together a progressive dinner type deal. Maybe use back to school as an excuse.

John

I am voting on sdrealtor's theory as the most likely reason. There is one thing that binds suburbanites and that is alcohol. If a neigbor shows up with a bottle of wine, insist on opening it right there and sharing it don't just accept it as a gift, that is how I invite myself over. If you don't get the welcoming comittee, become the chairman and start crashing other people's houses with wine as a "gift." All you need is one taker and you will be in the club and get the invites. It also lets you know who the non drinkers or religious wackos are so you can avoid them in the future, life is too short to have sober friends. Cheers!

Don't be discouraged...sdrealtor is probably right about their thought process, but you can change that.

We got the same kind of treatment when we first moved in; even had one of the neighbors tell us they were going to move because of all the renters moving in (knowing full-well we were renting). Now, they bring our kids holiday treats and talk to us more than any other neighbors. We've been here longer than most "buyers" since 2004 -- they've largely been foreclosed on or sold already.

One way to get "into" the n'hood is to do work in the front yard. If they see you making improvements to the house (just plant some flowers, pull weeds, sweep the walkway, etc.), they will appreciate your efforts to "keep their property values up." This also affords you (and them) an opportunity to talk, as neighbors go for walks or do their own yard maintenance or just come by because it's easy to approach someone who's working in the yard.

If the wine and yard work don't do it, they aren't worthy of your friendship.

Best of luck!

I think the yard work idea is brilliant. I talk to everyone in my hood when they are out front. Try it and if you have friendly neighbors worth meeting it will probably work.

My neighbors may look down on us as renters as I pull up in my 08 Lexus but the fact is I drive a nicer car than they do and that really pisses them off. Honey, why does the 30 year old renter drive that car and I don't?

Bottom Line: It is not you, it is the fact that they are screwed and my pay an extra 1/2 million $ in interest over the next 20 years because their phantom equity is gone. Their subconscious is jealous of your situation.

We live in Temecula and rent a beautiful house . . . .and have seen the condo we rented two years ago drop 60% in value. . . .sixty percent. How do you recover from that?

Every we know is screwed. . . everybody. And those that rent really can't afford to buy. Only my wife and I and one other couple we know decided that this was an irrational bubble three years ago.

The 80/20 loans are coming home to roost so you should start to see the economic cracks. . . auto business and retail is going to hell. . . so your neighbors should be laid off real soon.

Be thankful you have cash, no liabiliy and are employed.

When I see a 30 something person drive a brand new luxury toyota with a family, I immediately think...
(and it has nothing to do with jealously)

1) Got Lease? or
2) Got financing? or
3) Got savings?

But that's just smucky me :) I drive a 8 year old clunker, but it's more out of choice than necessity. Soon to be retired as a beater though.

Of course I would never say it to a neighbor. I'm pretty friendly in person :)

I rented a house close to La Costa Canyon HS on Corte Del Cruce. We moved in and one neighbor brought us a bottle of wine. Another brought us a list of all the neighbors "close by" that included names, kids names, phone numbers etc. We all waved at each other when we pass by etc. It was very friendly.

Sounds too fantastic.

We've been renting a house in PQ since April. Not one of our neighbors said a single word to us since we moved in. Someone stuck an empty juice cup from Burger King into our mailbox once. That's as friendly as our neighbors get.

In response, I completely gave up mowing and watering the front yard. (Watering part was partly necessity, there's no sprinkler system in our front yard, and I got tired of watering everything manually, with a hose) It's starting to look like Wild West.

Esmith,

Sorry to hear about that maybe things will turn around for you.

John

The perception of discrimination or lack of friendlness is not limit to renters. We live in a gated community with no renters where average home values hover well over 1M even today. I submit the following alternative possibilities.

(1) They are very busy people. A large number of my neighbors own their business or hold upper management positions. This typically requires 60+ hours workweek that sometimes include weekends. They are tired and simply lack the energy to cultivate new friends. Any downtime is usually spent with existing friends or family. We feel this way sometimes.

(2) Some are networkers always looking to build their up social capital and invest with any friends (or neighbors) whom they perceive to have liquidity. We've been approached at least 4 times in the 1st year of living here to participate in some type of (business or real estate) investment. Based on previous experiences, our rule is to never never invest with friends or family because if it fails, bad feelings develop and family relationships and friendships are ruined forever. We just tell everyone we have no money to invest and they have all slowly gone away. They are still cordial, but nowhere near as friendly as they use to be. As a renter, you are no doubt perceived to be unable to help them build their empire.

(3) The gossip mill runeth over spewing venom. Send your wife to the neighborhood Bunco meeting and have her recon the topics of discussion. She will probably report back that the alpha hens cackle endlessly about every other neighbor with topics ranging from boob jobs to your unsightly landscape design. My wife stopped attending after a few of these events, and now she is perceived as unsocial. The same applies to meeting new neighbors in that she is guarded until she has a sense of your discretion or ability to control gossip.

Of the 3 locations we have rented, I can say without doubt that the yuppie McMansion set has been the absolute worst.

For one entire year, the only neighbor who spoke to us was another renter. (And fellow bubble sitter!)

I didn't get too broken up about it because it helped me fine tune my shopping list when we eventually buy again. No McMansions. Not even in "upscale" areas. My perception is that it was more about appearances there... and the only way to gain approval was the prove you could afford to live there by buying. No thanks.

I could be wrong - or maybe I'm just a bit sensitive, but that's how it felt.

So yeah, I have experienced what you are describing. The good news is that you are not stuck with these people forever -- you get to move whenever you want. And to be honest, I think that's enviable. :)

no we are not black....professional white people to answer the post from above...I think the yardwork idea is a pretty good one and I was actually going to be doing that anyway...I am treating it like my own house and watering the newly installed lawn everyday (even though I pay for the water)...

thanks for the good advice....And yes, perhaps there are alot of other professionals juggling the kids and careers which makes little time for socializing....but I will do my part and see what happens...

Pk, my observation here in CV is in the interest of your kids, it's probably best you get them involved in some sort of activity or sports. Though my neighbors are pretty cool to me and vice versa, we rarely hang out because a lot of us have our own set of friend circles. However, I find that taking my kid to their activity events, I end up spending a lot of time with my kid's friend's parents all over carmel valley.

soccer and softball/baseball are pretty big with games always playing on the weekends at parks.

For toddlers, try mingling in the playground at public parks. Or tumbling/gymnastic classes, or the Carmel Valley community center has a boat load of activity.

I've got my kid joining a gymanastics class. By the time she's 6, she's be just in time to compete in the 2012 olympics. I'll just make sure to provide a passport that says she's 16.

From everything I can gather (I'm a renter) my neighbors really like us a lot. We are always invited to the annual rib-cook off/drunken bash. They appreciate that we at least keep the front respectable (our backyard is a little bit of a kid jungle). Most seem to really dislike our landlords and basically consider them cheap-wads who won't fix anything.

One even confronted the owner about his no-dog policy and chewed him out. "These are the best renters you've ever had and all the previous ones had a dog". 3 years there now. In fact most try to get us to buy when one of the local homes goes into foreclosure, but I always decline.. Naah too soon.

Alcohol was definitely a big factor in getting to meet some of them as standing outside on a friday having some beers is a great conversation starter.

The yardwork is definitely a big hit, I highly recommend that one. Another thing that made a big difference is our new glider; if you are relaxing/talking/swinging/sipping in the front yard, people can easily stop and chat. Offer them a caprahina and you'll have a friend for life.